Too Lazy to Fail

From Charles Spurgeon:

To understand the delightful attributes of lovingkindness is an attainment as pleasant as it is profitable. Those who are proficient scholars in the art of gratitude will be the sweetest singers to the glory of Jehovah.

I overheard something on Tracie’s computer that struck me as uniquely bizarre:

Heil Honey I’m Home! is a short-lived and controversial British television sitcom, produced in 1990.

The show was centred on fictionalised versions of Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun, who lived together in suburban bliss, until the day their lives are turned upside-down by their new neighbours, the Goldensteins, who are Jewish. The show’s plots inevitably centered around Hitler’s inability to get along with his neighbours. A caption at the beginning of the episode presented the series as a ‘lost’ sitcom from the 50s, recently re-discovered. The show spoofed elements of 1950s and 1960s American sitcoms such as Leave It to Beaver and I Love Lucy, including the corny title, plot and dialogue that was light to the point of vacuous, and unwarranted applause whenever a character appeared on screen.

The show actually begins at 0:45.

Eva: You got the prime minister of England coming over here to the apartment tomorrow and you don’t tell me so I can get something out of the ice box?!

Adolf: Well, honey, if you’re going to get on my back about everything, I’m not going to tell you WHY he’s coming.

Eva: Oh, you don’t need to tell me WHY, I know WHY…

Adolf: *looks over*

Eva: It’s Czechoslovakia.

Adolf: *consternated look*

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Sorry for two lolcat posts in a row, but Tracie snapped this picture and it was too good to pass up.

Seen on my way out of a local stop-n-rob:

“Oh, man! What are we gonna do now? Maybe we should go down the street where we’re allowed to wear our masks so we can rob them without getting caught!”

Also note: this was on my way out of the store. The sign was not double-sided. I suppose it was supposed to make the employees feel better? Or, considering the advertisement above it, also not double-sided, maybe someone hung the door backwards? Oh yeah, that’s got to be it.

Wait for it.

In their sleavies, of course!

Sorry, couldn’t think of a title.

This was what I got to check in my absolutely snazzy motel room during a recent work-related stay at a TN state park. Notice that my old-fashioned mechanical key was given to me in a magnetic key-card sleeve.

Of particular interest is “Magnets, such as those on purses and wallets, can damage your card. Use this sleeve to protect the magnetic stripe from damage.”

Even if the guest ignores the stupidity of getting custom-made key-card holders for a mechanical key, do they think that magnetic stripes on key-cards and credit cards are that easy to demagnetize? (Answer: Yes, but not with anything likely to be in your purse) If it is truly that easy to damage your key-card with the magnets on your person, will a simple paper sleeve protect the stripe?

I mean, I understand that you don’t want me carrying around a key-card in the same pocket as my keys, slowly grinding away the precious bits, but if you don’t want me to scratch it, just say so! If you’re afraid that little old me won’t understand that you don’t want me to scratch up the card, just tell me to keep it in the sleeve at all times, and save me the well-intentioned misdirection!

I also am continually amused at trust in “Duplication Prohibited” keys. With the exception of government-marked or keys or keys with patented designs, there is no legal barrier to making one sliver of metal look like another sliver of metal. They give you those one-sided deadbolts and chain locks at hotels for a reason, kids. Use them.

(Handy tip: pointing the whole “Duplication Prohibited” fallacy out to the administration of the University you used to work at while handing in your master keys is not a good way to leave a lasting pleasant impression, even if you were just trying to help. If you look back on your way out, you will see them through the window, talking on the phone while looking way too serious about the whole thing.)